People ask me...

People often ask me what a day is like with Bug and her special needs and the challenges of now adding a second bundle of energy nicely named Doo...I often just grin.

I recently had someone with the audacity to say to me, "When I heard you adopted a second child I thought to myself WHAT were you thinking?" That person obviously does not know the true joy of children, nor does she cherish the big and small triumphs that children bring. However, I can not say that a day in my life is not challenging. Anyone around me can say that I generally do not cry in front of people...I do not like to be vulnerable in front of others...but things change when you realize you can't be everything to everyone all the time.

There are days, like today, that I am able to take Bug's diagnosis in stride and roll with the punches--fight it head on. I treasure the fact that she continues to cuddle for hours at a time when other almost three year old children no longer do so. I love the fact that I am able to read her like a book by the faces she makes and the body language she gives-no words are necessary. Her eyes give her away. It is a blessing that even though she has seizures...I am able to tell that she is about to have one by hearing the way she breathes differently over the monitor. These are gifts given to me. There are days that I wake up and I wish so desperately that she would talk to me. Walk. Run. Play with the other children. Do arts and crafts. Paint me a picture for the fridge (that I don't like stuff on--for those that know me.) :)

Layla-Doo is crawling...she goes everywhere. Everywhere Bug goes she follows. It took awhile for Bug to warm up to her...but the two are now able to be in the playroom together without me fearing harms-way for Doo! Watching Doo smile, laugh and admire her sister is one of my greatest joys. There is nothing like seeing the interaction of your children. That love is precious. Doo knows nothing of her sisters limitations...just that she is bigger and cool right now--and that is how it will always be. She will always know Bug for who she is...to me that is the most amazing thing between their relationship. A love like no other.

Life is challenging...two not walking is hard. Seizures are hard. Allergic reactions to medicines is very trying. Lining up naptime--difficult. Multiple therapy sessions-time consuming. Loving two miraculous little girls given to me and my husband by God--EASY.

People ask me--what were you thinking? It's called love.

Much love,
~K